I am in Infertile Hell

I can't take it anymore.

I'm about to start to hyperventilate...which is demonstrative of how bad I can't take it anymore. Or seriously about to just up and leave work.

2 of my coworker's wives are/were pg. Baby #1 was born 4 weeks ago tomorrow (I won the baby pool we had here), baby #2 is coming any day now. Hopefully next Thursday, but that's beside the point. (Although, how ironic would it be for the infertile to win both baby pools?)

Well, said coworker's know about 11 other people that were due right around now and I sit outside one of their offices (down the hall from the other, which is just like sitting right outside because he's loud) and hear all the baby conversations. Its not only chatting with their new parent/about-to-be-new parent buddies, but coworker #1 talks about the baby and coworker #2 talks about the baby they are about to have to our business associates too. Out of all these baby conversations, I've heard them mention IF treatments very vaguely in reference to only one couple out of the bazillion others. I can tell they obviously don't know much about IF and it takes every bone in my body to not open my mouth and correct them.

I must hear about 5-6 HOURS worth of baby conversations in a given day lately--between people here in the office and them talking to other people on the phone. Today, both cw AND his wife sent me baby pictures.

I feel like I've really been such a trooper about the whole ordeal the past couple months but with the excitement a new baby AND a labor watch going this week, I really can't handle it. If this doesn't die down soon, I'm going to need to be committed...straightjacket and all. My method of coping has been to pretend to just not be interested in babies, which has of course has me coming across as a bit of a baby-hater. If they only knew that the real reason is I'm uninterested is because that its KILLING me. I'm seriously on the verge of tears typing this.

I need some distractions to keep me busy until August. I also think I need to somehow devise a way to work from home until then. :-(

I feel like one of those people who is so miserable that they can't be around normal people, like I'll infect the happy people . -Grey's Anatomy